Respect…Uncurl slowly

Posted: July 17, 2012 in Emotions, Working Out/Health
Tags: , , , , ,

I never used to take care of myself –

Hating my body –

The wolf whistles from men when I was in good shape as a woman

make me want to curl up in a little ball

they used to honk their horns

and yell out smooching noises

It continued when I came out of the closet as a lesbian

but with the change of my outward appearance

it eventually stopped

but the hatred of my body didn’t

I never uncurled myself from that little ball

Being free of my job I’m able to

be me

and not have to shave

keep my hair ‘professional’ and acceptable for clients

I’m finally passing more

Three years on T gave me the deeper voice

body changes

but I had to shave every morning –

I’ve been working out 5 to 6 days a week to get myself back

I made a committment to myself

The T settles me and makes me more focused

Today was my heavy work out day

Part of taking care of myself is my commitment and my word to myself.

In my haste to meet my buddy earlier I neglected to do three weight exercises.

I remembered it as I was getting ready for bed.

Instead of waving it off I got up and did them – three sets each. I am glad I did.

I made a promise to myself to take care of myself and I have to honor that commitment.

Keeping true to myself and my word extends beyond myself. If I am able to honor my commitments to myself then I can do that with others as well

– it’s about respecting myself.

Uncurl slowly….


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